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Lonely gainers

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Glutton   United Kingdom
Joined 15 years
It seems to me as a gainer,that gaining can be a very lonely life.My personal experience is that there appear to be very few of us.I know of nobody in 'real' (ie away from the internet)life who is a gainer,either male or female and the stigma with regard to gaining is so great and deep rooted that I cannot bring myself to admit what I am to my friends and family.
I am committed to this life now,as,truthfully,it's all that I have ever really wanted and I regret all the years that I fought my feelings.However,it's a life that few people understand or accept away from here.
I don't want to give the impression that I'm really unhappy..I'm not;but the life of a gainer doesn't seem to me to be all plain sailing and I just wondered what experiences and thoughts other gainers had?smiley
13 years

Lonely gainers

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Glutton   United Kingdom
Joined 15 years
Sweet_Treat wrote:
I don't think gainers would have to be so lonely if only us FAs were more organized as a community- i.e. more meet-ups so that we could get in contact more easily. As a lonely feeder, the thought of lonely gainers out there makes me feel quite distressed- but at the same time, assures me that we are never really alone smiley
Agree with this..there are plenty of BBW events/parties etc,but nothing for feeders/feedees/gainers..I guess that we're too thinly spread around the globesmileyAm glad we at least have FFsmiley
13 years

Lonely gainers

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Glutton   United Kingdom
Joined 15 years
scrambledegg wrote:
glutton wrote:
It seems to me as a gainer,that gaining can be a very lonely life.My personal experience is that there appear to be very few of us. I know of nobody in 'real' (ie away from the internet)life who is a gainer,either male or female and the stigma with regard to gaining is so great and deep rooted that I cannot bring myself to admit what I am to my friends and family.....
Hell,this is going to make me sound SO oldsmiley...I did have to deal with it 20years ago.I used to think that I was THE only person in the world like this and suppressed my feelings for so many years..true,the internet and this site have made a big differencesmiley

Sad but true, there are a small number of us, but at least we have sites like this and the wider internet to help us figure it all out. Imagine dealing with this 20 years ago! I think you'd have to be extremely lucky to meet someone in real life outside of FF who was into all this stuff, but that is what this site is good for, bringing like minded people together.

There are always meet up's / events going on. The next UK one being the BGP event in London on 7th May. So it is possible to meet real people, in real life who love all this stuff smiley
13 years

Lonely gainers

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OniGumo   United States
Joined 18 years
I've definitely felt this too. Especially since starting University studies. I moved to a new city *you've all probably read this recently in a few other posts I've made*, long of the short; because I'm socially insecure, despite being here for about 2 years I haven't really made any friends that I hang out with regularly.

And, of course, I've also not met anyone special. Mostly because I don't really think I could make a relationship work if my partner wasn't into this stuff *FFA at the very least, but ideally a feeder*. Of course the fact that I get nervous around girls who I find attractive and subscequently can't talk doesn't help either...
13 years

Lonely gainers

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Gary1627   United Kingdom
Joined 14 years
I think loneliness is something we all suffer from now and then. With a fetish/lifestyle like this though, it does seem that no one outside of this community could possibly understand how it feels.
Within these walls we feel safe as we can share our fantasies or experiences, but to the outside world it's something that has had nothing but really bad press and we must appear to most like some kind of monsters that should be locked away.
This site has to exist so that we can all carry on like normal as if there is nothing out of the ordinary happening.
13 years

Lonely gainers

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FAscination   Belgium
Joined 13 years
Twirly wrote:
I have been feeling pretty lonely about this lately. I have seen threads that have been somewhat similar to this one and I always wonder how true it is that feedees (or feeders for that matter) really are more alone and less likely to find a fulfilling partner or are we just focusing on these feeling when we are down. I've never met another person who hasn't felt alone. While I usually think (hope) that my current reoccurring sense of loneliness has nothing to do with my gaining desiring it sure as hell keeps on feeling like it is. Then again I try to remember that I am writing my thesis, looking for a new job, I need to move and I pretty much started my life over this last year. So maybe it is just general stress?
In my case it is definitely linked with loneliness. I don't consider myself a feedee, but have been occassionally stuffing myself and trying to gain some weight, and it was always when I felt quite lonely, usually after a break-up or so. It is like for lack of a big partner I focus on my own fat.
13 years

Lonely gainers

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Johnxyz   United States
Joined 17 years
I'm not a gainer, but happiness comes from within. If you are gaining, and it makes you happy, you should be able to attract friends. True, the friends may not understand your gaining, and you can't discuss it with them. But if they see you happy and gaining, hopefully they will accept you.
13 years